WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT
FLYING SAUCER ABDUCTION INSURANCE
“My husband is always talking about ‘alien abductions’ and ‘Fortean phenomena,’ whatever those are. So my children and I got him your Flying Saucer Insurance Policy, and he absolutely loves it.”
---- K. Crosmar, Los Angeles, California “I have always been interested in UFO’s. I love the Flying Saucer Abduction Policy and all the other material you sent.” ---- H. Herrera, Pacoima, California “My young daughter borrowed my Certificate of Flying Saucer Abduction Insurance Policy and took it to school for ‘Show and Tell.’ (She didn’t tell me.) She showed the class the certificate and explained how mommy is worried about being kidnapped by a flying saucer but if it happens mommy will get $10,000,000 from your insurance company and maybe my daughter will have a baby sister that is not ‘like us’ or ‘the flying saucer people’ but ‘in between.’ My daughter also started reading bits from your article ‘How to Avoid Being Abducted by Space Aliens,’ like about ‘nasal implants’ and ‘body probes,’ until the teacher stopped her. I have gotten some strange looks from other parents since then, but have simply explained that the insurance was given to me as a gift, and I am not really afraid of being abducted.” ---- Martha T., Miami, Florida “I think the Insurance certificate for alien abduction is a work of art in itself. I have it on display in my office along with my organization and club memberships and golf tournament trophies, and it’s the only thing anyone notices.” ---- Joe McCampbell, Tucson, Arizona |
“I am sorry I cannot use my name because I am a television show host. However, I want to thank you for the beautiful abduction policy which just came (and thank you for the fast service). I also enjoyed the other papers, such as the ‘Avoid Abduction’ article and ‘How to File a Claim Under Your Policy.’ But what do I do if the UFO Captain refuses to sign that I was aboard or give me his (hers? its?) thumb print? If they have a thumb, I mean.”
---- B., Beverly Hills, California “Thank you so much for offering this service. Even if proving a claim is tough, and the millions of dollars payout is at $1 a year.” ---- Steve Wysnewcki, Nashville, Tennessee “The Certificate makes a nice contrast with my boring documents, like my diplomas and C.P.A. certificate. No one likes visiting the IRS (where I work) but at least the UFO abduction insurance puts them in a somewhat more relaxed mood before their audit.” ---- Howard Sullivan (C.P.A.), Trenton, New Jersey “I am a 7th grader in middle school. My classmates and I got our favorite teacher (English) your “flying saucer insurance’ as a Christmas gift. ---- Gloria T., San Diego, California “Our high school had an event to honor one of our science teachers on his retirement. Because he was fascinated by space exploration, we got him your space alien kidnapping insurance, and it brought down the house.” ---- Patty Sorenson, Minneapolis, Minnesota |